Ways Adults Can Manage Stress and Grief Reactions

Let others help you. Talk about your thoughts and feelings as often as you feel the need. Identify friends, coworkers, counselors/therapists or spiritual directors who are helpful listeners. Repeatedly talking about the event and your reactions is part of the healing process.



Recognize that your feelings (sadness, sorrow, confusion, anger, etc.) are all normal reactions to the traumatic event. You may find yourself even becoming more irritable at times.



Understand that current losses or traumatic events often resurrect prior losses, and that multiple losses can erode past coping strategies that seemed to work well for you.



Make a special effort to take care of yourself:

Make sure to get enough sleep. An increase in fatigue is common at these times.

Eat a balanced diet. You might even consider reducing caffeinated beverages.

Consider meditation, relaxation tapes, or listening to your favorite music.

Get physical exercise - e.g., take a walk, walk the dog, garden, "work out", etc.

There is a temptation when the stress level is high to try to numb the feelings with alcohol and drugs. Substance abuse complicates the problems, rather than relieving them.



Avoid making major life decisions regarding your job, buying a house or car, moving, etc., during this emotionally unsettling time.



Connect with your friends and family in an enjoyable activity - going to a park, bowling, attending a concert, playing monopoly, renting a silly movie, etc.



Try to maintain a steady level of productive activity at work and play, but pace yourself. Try to finish one activity or project before beginning another.



You may discover that you have to write things down or remind yourself more often.



Know and respect your personal limitations. Don't make unreasonable demands on yourself. Allow yourself to say "No" without feeling guilty.



Try to avoid feeling that you have to "get through this quickly" and "get back to your normal routine." Give yourself permission to slow down.



However, don't be surprised if you do get back into a normal work and family routine fairly quickly. This can be reassuring and comforting to many.

Above all, be understanding of yourself and others. What you are experiencing is normal for a traumatic situation.

Grant Wood Area Education Agency
Critical Incident Stress Management Team